brief update

still in the midst of some chaos...

...my interview went fairly well this past wednesday, and there proved to really be no reason for me to have gotten as nervous as i did. i have to complete a few more steps to the application process and i guess we will see what happens. unfortunately if i got the job, which would provide me an opportunity to work in a field that really interests me and i would probably really enjoy the summer, there is a very good possibility that i will not be paid yet again this summer. which is awful news. the internship itself is unpaid but there might be a way for me to get a public interest fellowship grant to compensate me, so i will be following up with that paperwork and option as well. but there is no guarantee i will get it, so it will ultimately come down (if i don't get the grant) to whether i want to sacrifice and not get paid to do something i will enjoy and benefit from, or don't take it b/c it is unpaid and take my chances finding something else (paid) for the summer, which isn't even guaranteed since the job market sucks right now. yes, even for law student interns / summer associates. This is all assuming i get offered the position, which i am not even sure i will get it. so i really just have to wait and see what happens.

classes are hectic and busy as per the usual, especially with trying to start finals prep and scheduling / registering for next semester. the next few weeks will probably be hellish.

my paper is coming along. i haven't made nearly as much progress on it as i should have by now, but i am hoping to make a lot of head-way tonight. i am just glad that it is due thursday and it will be a HUGE load off of my back. right now it just sucks because i am so freaking sick of writing this damn brief.

my family and i have had an extremely, extremely difficult week with my grandmother. i do not want to go into detail at this time. as much as this blog has allowed me the ability to vent and get out all of the feelings floating around my head, it is too hard for me to even begin to write any of the events of the last few days. i am / we all are, very much still processing what has happened, which i am sure is going to take more than a few days. a lot of discussions need to take place and decisions need to be made in the near future, and it upsetting all 0f us very much. i just hope that we can find some kind of way to adapt and do what is best. i know that we will find our way. i just know it is going to take time. i will add that i am extremely lucky to have an amazing best friend, renee, who was a complete godsend when i called her last night and through my sobs, she did what i needed her to do--listen, be there for me, and tell me everything would be okay. i don't know what i would have done without her last night.